I’m at a loss (6/6/2020)

This just isn’t working.

Yes, yes, I vanished again. Honestly… I just haven’t been able to come up with anything. I’ll review the anime I’ve been watching over time when I officially return from my little break. But elsewise… I’m kinda stuck. I’ve been sitting on God Only Knows how many posts, at this point. None of them felt like anything I wanted to post. And with the state the world is in, at the moment… well, things haven’t been great for me, mentally. I’ve been keeping sane through work on my projects. And I’ve been fending off boredom with videogames. But I’ve honestly not done much else.

I want to make more content about writing, but… how exciting would it even be? Just random updates about how I hit another goal? Eh. Basic journaling is just boring to me and my mental state hasn’t been in flux enough for me to bother recording anything. It’d be monotonous, at best. Meanwhile, I’ve stalled out on EXTRA anyway because of not being able to go to work. I really wanted to wait until I had some cover art to start publishing it. But I haven’t been able to pay for a cover because I need to save my money, for the time being. (Honestly, I’m not in any particular rush to go back to my job, but… money. O’ how I can’t wait for writing and talking about nerdy things to be my career). That said, I also haven’t actually gotten much farther in my writing on that, anyway.

There has been some Burning Sky progress. The prologue book is nearly up in its full form on our website. Just two more chapters to go. Then a bit of a break and we’ll see what we do about the remainder of the series. But it’s gonna be… challenging. We’re going to be doing something relatively similar with the other books in the series. Art teases and stuff. Maybe some other little things, as well. I dunno. Anyway, the progress we made was actually in the background department, but we essentially just wrapped development of the timeline for all the most significant events in the lore of the Burning Sky world. It was a fun little diversion, honestly. Nice to take a break from the ordinary writing to work on that a bit. The project is still ludicrously ambitious. But I’m honestly raring to go with it.

Aside from that, I did try to write a post about… everything. All the stuff going on, right now. But it just didn’t feel right. I wasn’t happy with the words I was producing on that front. And if I’m going to talk about a topic like the current state of my country and my experience as someone “of color,” then… I dunno, I just think it warrants better than what I was producing. A lot of people are hurting right now. People are angry. Scared. Confused. And I honestly can’t speak to a lot of that. It feels wrong – disingenuous, even – to force myself to say something when I’ve yet to figure out something to say. So when/if I say something, it’ll be at a later time. When I’ve been able to meditate on the matter a little more.

Anyway, that’s about all I have to share, though. What’s everyone else doing to keep from bouncing off the walls?